Death is my fate as much as any other mortals, I am well aware of this and I have accepted it as such long, long ago. There is no shame to be had in death except for how you die. If I should kill myself, that is shameful, if I should beg of you to kill me, is that not shameful as well?

I died a coward the first time, so accepting of my fate so that I could rest instead of live a life of suffering and misery. I want for Elysium, but if I die another shameful death, who is to say that I would return there? Why should I get what I want?